Boyfriend's Family is Rude
Q: My boyfriend is great, but his family is a nightmare. They've never liked me, and ever since we moved in together, they've gotten even more rude. His mother hangs up whenever I answer the phone and his sister "jokes" about how much better he could do. I've asked my boyfriend to stand up for me, but he never does. How do I get him on my side? - Caty, 23
Dr. Susan: It might help if you try to understand your boyfriend's family's feelings. You're young, and he probably is, too, so the fact that he's living with someone they haven't liked upsets them. Of course, they should be reasonably agreeable toward you anyway. He should insist on that level of basic respect from them. Sit him down and tell him how hurt your feelings are. The least he ought to do is have a talk with them and ask them not to be rude to you, because he loves you. You may never get them on your side, but he can at least make it more plain that HE is.
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.