Three On Every Date Is Too Many
Q: My boyfriend keeps asking me to invite my girlfriend along when we go out. I know he's serious with me, but he gives her a lot of attention too. Just about every time we plan to go out to bars and stuff, he says I should get her to come hang out with us. Plus if she's at my place he'll just ask her to come along himself, without talking to me about it. I'm starting to feel like he's interested in her as more than a friend. Plus it feels like he doesn't think it's fun if we just go out by ourselves. I feel weird about this thing but I'm not sure what to do. -- Morgan, 22
Dr. Susan: If you were an old married couple, I could see that adding this new person to your social life might liven things up, not necessarily in a sexual way. But you guys are so young that I wonder what's going on, just as you do. Your boyfriend may really like your friend a lot. You would have to pay close attention to what's going on between them. Maybe talk to her about her feelings about him. Also let him know you're starting to feel like a third-wheel when he always brings her along. I'd be even more concerned, due to the drinking that does on in bars. No one makes the best decision while inebriated. Be honest with him about your anxieties.
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Advice for Her
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.