Can a Drunken Hook-Up Last?
Q: I've been friends with this girl for five years, during which she was seeing the same guy off and on. She often discussed their relationship with me. A few months ago, after a long talk and a few too many drinks, we hooked up. She told me she was no longer seeing the guy, but I later learned she didn't actually break up with him until after our hook-up. I'm kind of excited to see if she and I can be more than just friends, but I'm worried about how our relationship got started. Should I be worried that if she cheated with me, she'll cheat on me? - Patrick, 30
Dr. Susan: Will a cheater cheat again? Good question. As she was off and on with this other fellow for years, that doesn't say much for her consistency or dependability. Keep in mind, too, that many people won't quit a relationship until they have another one lined up. So there's some chance you have started something good, but about an equal chance that your relationship with her isn't going to go anywhere. I suggest you give her the benefit of the doubt, put your anxieties aside, and give the relationship your all. Just keep your eyes open.
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Susan K. Perry, Ph.D.
Susan K. Perry, Ph.D., is a social psychologist, relationship expert, and bestselling and award-winning author. Her books include Loving in Flow: How the Happiest Couples Get and Stay That Way, and Kylie's Heel, a novel for adults.
Pamela G. Chollet, Ph.D.
Dr. Pamela Chollet has a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and Master degrees in educational psychology and fine arts. Her passion has been helping people face and get through those times when they feel trapped and unable to move forward.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D.
Anna Charbonneau, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist, stress management expert, and author. If you're feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or struggling to make changes in your life, Anna can help.