Guy with a Big Nose
I had been talking to this guy online for a week or so because his profile said he liked a band I liked and he went to the same college as me. No one likes the same bands as me, so I thought I had a new friend. We talked on the phone a few times and he seemed nice; I wasn't interested, but I don't look gift friends in the mouth. So, I figured, ok, I have a new friend. One day, he suggests we meet outside one of the buildings at school and head to a local diner for lunch together. I figured, what the hell, so I agreed. He said, "I'll be wearing a green jacket, and I have a big nose. I'll wait on the bench," and he hung up! Now, I'm thinking, "Big nose, ok…." Then, I see it and I'm like, "Holy sh**!" So, we went to the diner and while I was looking at things, he decided on a foot long hot dog ... with onions and mustard. I tried to be polite and keep the conversation going, but it turned out he doesn't know anything about any of the bands he said he liked before. We had almost nothing to talk about and, when I ranted in my usual manner, he laughed through his nose and sprayed onions and mustard all over the table. Finally, someone I knew went by outside and I excused myself to go and talk to him. I came back in, paid my share of the bill, and told the guy that I needed to go help my friend with some school work. Luckily, I never saw him again.
— Monica, 23