Signs That Boredom Is Creeping In
Does your sweetheart's face light up when you walk in the room or does she not even look at you most of the time these days? When you talk about the weekend, does she already have separate plans? Uh-oh, sounds like you've got some work to do. If you've got that nagging feeling that your girl is no longer thrilled when you come home or when you crawl into bed together, you might want to make some changes.
Sign#1: She's Not Listening
You get home from work, start telling her about your day, and she's nodding and uh-huh'ing, but clearly not listening. This is a sign that you've become a broken record and she's tired of hearing it. If it was in the early stages of your relationship, how would you be handling this type of conversation? If you're smart, you'd be asking about her day first. Then maybe you wouldn't exactly unload about the difficult day you had, you'd talk about it in smaller, gentler doses. Then change the subject to something positive. Sure you should be able to vent with the one you love, but she'll be happier to hear it if it's not in unlimited amounts.
Sign #2: She's Reading in Bed
Does she read in bed every night and get annoyed when you try to touch her and distract her? Take the hands-off approach first. Before she goes to bed, find her bookmark and slip a note in the spot where she left off reading. When you write the note, tell her everything you adore about her and what you want to do to her to show it. Find a balance - don't go too mushy, but don't focus totally on the sex you want either. This is about making her feel good, in more ways than one.
Sign #3: She's Got Other Plans
You want to go to a baseball game together like you used to, but she's told her friends she'll go shopping with them. You suggest a hike in the woods, but she's scheduled a zumba class at the gym. What gives? You're both taking each other for granted. Plan some dates in advance - ask her out and put it on the calendar. Say "It's a date!" and show her that you really do want a date with her because you enjoy spending time with her, not because she owes it to you.
Sign #4: She's Got a Headache
If the headache excuse is cropping up more and more, most likely you're not doing what needs to be done to get her in the mood. That does not mean mauling her. It means talking and listening and connecting with her mind and heart. Yes, really! Treat her like she's the new girl you're dating and you're trying to find out what makes her tick. Do that first, and you're more likely to set off her alarm and yours.
When boredom sets in, you might feel hurt and rejected. But things will work out better if you put aside those feelings for a bit and remember that this isn't all about you. It's about doing what you can to revive the good feelings in your relationship so that you'll both start wanting to get the goods again.
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