Lies Women Tell

If I told you that the women in your life spoke nothing but the honest truth, well, I'd be lying.

Not only are women frequent fibbers -- a University of Massachusetts study showed that 60 percent of both men and women lie at least once during a ten-minute conversation -- women are considered better at it, since they're generally better speakers and inspire more credibility.

Let's get one thing straight right now: I'm not saying women are generally untrustworthy. When I say lie here, I'm talking about the "little, white" variety and not the "big, fat" kind. Still, why does she do it?

To Make You Feel Better

That UMASS study found that while both genders lie the same amount, their reasons are different. For women, most fibs are told to make the person they're talking to feel better. Like when you ask if your hair is thinning and she says no. Or when she agrees that your boss makes ridiculous demands of you. Be glad she does this, and remember that when it's her turn to ask you if those pants make her look fat, the answer is always no.

To Save Herself

These are the lies that make her look better or more attractive to you, or to protect herself. Examples: "I'm not even thinking about marriage" (she's had the wedding planned since second grade), "I love football" (that doesn't mean there aren't women out there that can tell you why prevent defense is useless, but this can be a common lie), and "I'm not ready for a serious relationship either."

To Avoid a Fight

You didn't really believe her when you asked if something was wrong and she said no, did you? These are the lies she uses to avoid an issue she's unwilling to bring up at the moment, like "forgetting" to mention she went to the movies with a male friend to avoid your over-possessiveness. Common examples: "I don't remember how much it cost" and "Nothing's wrong, I'm just tired."

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Try These Pickup Lines

  • If you put 11 roses in your arms and looked in the mirror, you would see the twelve most beautiful things in the world.
  • I need some Pepcid AC, because you make my heart burn.
  • You must have been a Girl Scout because you have my heart all tied up in knots.
  • Your name must be Campbell 'cause you're Mmm! Mmm! Good.
  • I've got $10!