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Men, are you concerned that your bedmate's moans and groans are faker than Pam Anderson's - uh - hair color? Take this quiz to find out if women find you so-so in the sack or so-so-so sexy.

1. How many sexual positions do you include in your repertoire?
Two or three.
Whatever the mood calls for.
Whatever new move I read about.
All of 'em. The Kama Sutra doesn't know half of what I know.
One. What else is there other than the missionary position?

2. Which option best describes your collection of sexual accessories?

The Internet or Pornos.
Lotions, candles and edible panties.
Battery operated pleasure toys.
Whips, chains and blindfolds.
Condoms.

3. What are your feelings about talking dirty?

I feel silly talking dirty, but would like to try.
I love it, but don't usually say much.
I indulge when it's appropriate.
There's no topic too dirty for the walls of my room.
That's for porn stars.

4. If your partner started to direct your hands, or make suggestions, while the two of you were having sex, how would you respond?

I'd be insulted and sulk and unable to perform.
I'd do it, but then sulk afterwards.
I'd listen with open ears and follow orders.
I direct the traffic in bed. No one else does.
I'd be turned off by her forwardness and stop.

5. Your lover wants to talk about her sexual fantasy while you have intercourse. You...

Listen.
Listen and contribute to her fantasy.
Suggest we do it in real life, as long it's something I'm comfortable with.
Open up my closet and get out whatever props she needs to make her dream come true.
Clam up.

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